In My Place

2003-11-11

Waiting for the D man...

Ok..this sucks..I haven't had the chance to really talk to D since Saturday night..and I miss him terribly. It bothers me that I already feel so strongly about D. I'm not sure why I do. Maybe it's that chatting online and on the phone is easier for me than talking to him in person. I don't know what will happen when we actually do meet..I will probably be too nervous to even do anything but giggle like a little school girl.

God..I wish he would sign on already. I have thought about calling his house..but I can't bring myself to do it. We always talk online before we talk on the phone so I would feel too weird just calling him out of the blue..even though he said he would like that sometime. After last night though..I don't know..

I was a bit upset that I didn't get to talk to him last night after we had planned it..but I understood why. He was exhausted and he had to be up early for work..

I talk to Alex a lot about D and he doesn't even seem to mind. He has even talked about D coming to visit me or me going to visit him. I don't understand that..most boyfriends would be pissed off at this shit..but he doesn't seem to even care.

My arm feels as if it is going to break off right now..I actually went to the gym today and worked out for a bit and then I played volleyball for two hours. I also truly embarrassed myself while playing today..I was running to hit the ball back over the net..tripped and feel flat on my ass..All while about 20 people watched..oh what fun. I hope no one ever says anything to me about it. I need to go and put some ice on my arm and hope that it doesn't hurt bad tomorrow.

I am still on my diet and have lost about 35 pounds..yay me! I still have a long way to go until I am happy with myself..but hopefully it won't take me that much longer. D wants to meet sometime within the next few months..but I definitly have to lose a lot more before I even think about planning to see him...I am really longing for one of our 2 hour conversations right about now! He makes me feel all warm and fuzzy..and he always says sweet things to me..and I love it dammit...

well I guess that is all for now..Z has the day off from school tomorrow and I have a lot to do..

~Rachel