In My Place

2003-10-09

Now it's my Grandmother..what next the president?

Well I can't hardly believe what I read this morning. I thought this whole business with my mother and Z taking medication was over..oh how wrong I was. I went to check my email after taking Z to school, only to see an email from my grandmother (mom's mom) in my inbox. Now I barely know the woman and have only seen her 3 times in my entire 26 years of life. I surely don't think she is about to give me some lecture on anything..OH how wrong I was.

You know her email just added to my frustration and is making me even more angry at my Mother. How dare she write me an email about anything. This woman has no idea who I even am..and she certainly doesn't know Alex..yet she let her mouth run freely about him and everything else that she thought was wrong in my life. I couldn't believe what I read..and I will share it just so others can see how ridiculous it is.

These two are trying to make me feel guilty about trying to help my child. They are threatening taking legal action to take him away from me. Are they serious? I certainly hope not. I don't think it would happen anyway. I have never felt that my ability as a mother would be in question. I feel as if they are judging me and they have no right to. Neither one of them had any hand in raising me, yet they think they should tell me how to raise my son. I don't understand their thought process.

So here is the letter..

"I think you need to apologize to your Mother. She only gives good advice and should be taken no matter what."

Now let's address this first. Why should I apologize..shouldn't she? How does she know if my mother only gives good advice and why in the hell should I take someone elses advice no matter what. That would make me an idiot. I am not going to just do something because someone else told me to. Just because she is my mother doesn't mean she is automatically correct in everything that she says.

"I wish you would realize your responsibility to Zachary and the bad environment that you are subjected him too. Please think about what you are doing to him. He should always come first, not some slob that sits around doing nothing. this does not show Zachary how to live."

Now this is hilarious. What environment is she talking about? This woman has never even been to my house, yet she thinks my son is in the wrong environment. How would she even know? And her comments about Alex are sickening..that is how I know that my Mother has lied to her. Yeah Alex is just such a damn slob who does nothing but sit around the house..is she kidding me. This lady hasn't ever even met Alex..she definitly shouldn't be speaking about him based on what my mother says..My mom hates him and for no reason. Why in the hell would she even say that Z isn't first in my life..she hasn't a clue about anything in my life.

"He does not need pills to survive in this world. Only good discipline at school and at home. Set some examples for him, not subject him to all of this bad stuff."

Are you kidding me? Who in the hell said he needed pills to survive in this world? Do these people not understand what medicine my son was prescribed. I do discipline my child and I do try and set a good example for my child. Yes I do cuss in front of him..but if the worst thing he is going to do is cuss I don't think it's all that bad. He knows not to say the words and he has never said any that I know of at home or at school. What am I subjecting my child to? Being able to get a better education? Why is that so horrible? I wish my parents would have been there for me when I was young..but they weren't and I don't have any respect for them being like that and I certainly wouldn't take any advice from either parent about raising children..since they raised me by dropping me off at my grandparents and letting them do their job for them.

"You will probably not like this Email, and I usually do not step into anyone else's space, but you need to really look in the mirror, and talk to yourself about all the things you are NOT doing. You need to wake up and soon, before it is too late."

No I seriously just love this email. What did she expect.. a standing ovation for the total bullshit that is spewing out of this email? She usually doesn't step into anyone's space..Yeah right..if you didn't do that..you would have never sent me this email. What the hell do I need to wake up from? I am living my life and trying the best I can to make it in this fucking world and raise my child right so that he can survive in this world and these two are trying to tell me that I am wrong. How in the hell can two people who had no hand in raising me..think I would ever listen to what they had to say?

"YOU have only one Mother, who speaks the truth, and some where somehow you need to see what she is hoping will sink in. Zachary needs to be taken care of, and if you can't someone else will come into your world and shake it up...."

WHAT THE FUCK? Just because she is a mother she speaks the truth? Does she speak the truth when she tells her husband she loves him? Not from what she told me. How does her marrying someone because she wanted them to take care of her..make her a better person than me. I would rather be in a loving relationship than be with someone because of money..that's sick to me. Zachary is well taken care of..and I don't understand how they could think otherwise. This child has everything he could ever need or want. He is well fed, clothed and loved..OH ANOTHER FUCKING threat..who do they think they are..I would love to see them try. This is getting beyond ridiculous and the fact that my mother ran to her mommie because her daughter hurt her feelings is just sad. Sadly it makes my mother look like some little child who still needs her mommie to take care of her.

"Please think about this, and I may be on your list, and that's OK, I have worked hard and see that at least my children have all made it finally, and this would be unacceptable, to waste your life in such a manner and then reject your Mother who is always there. PLEASE WAKE UP AND APOLOGIZE AS QUICKLY AS YOU CAN."

Oh she is more than just on my shit list. I am pretty sure that I don't need to talk to her again either. I do not like drama and I do not want it in my life..she hasn't been around for the first 26 years of my life..so why would I even need her now? Now she is attacking me and saying I have no life. Isn't it nice to have people who don't know you judge your life. Oh I just love it..Reject my mother..please I told her I didn't want to speak to her..give me a break..and she was always there for me..LOL you have got to be fucking kidding me. She may have given birth to me but she sure as hell didn't raise me. If they think I am going to apologize then they have thought WRONG. It isn't going to happen. I don't feel like I need to, therefore I won't do it. I'm sure my mother isn't to happy that I don't want to talk to her and that I don't want her only grandchild around her at this point. But how in the hell could I ever trust her again? I could never let Z stay with her again. I would be afraid that she would try and kidnap him. I wouldn't put it past her. She had this big plan when I was little to kidnap me and move to Delaware to keep me from my dad and grandparents. She already had a job and place to live lined up before my Dad found info about it all. Thank God she didn't get away with it.

"She has your best interest in her heart and knows you need to take care of yourself and Zachary and not lazy people. Kick their butts to the curb and start anew. Go to college and make a better life for him, and not let him down. Love Grandma"

This last statement proves she doesn't know one thing about me. I am in College. If my mother had my best interests in her heart..she wouldn't have been out of my life so much when I was younger. I hate being rude and mean to people..but I am not going to sit her and take someone else judging the two most important people in my life..my child and my boyfriend. Why would I want to start anew? I started anew when I left Z's father because of how he treated me.I won't let anyone ever treat me like that again. I have talked about Alex and how he was in a really bad car wreck before..these people want to call him lazy because he hasn't been able to work yet. I don't understand that. He isn't lazy..he helps me out in raising my child..and helps me around the house..which is more that Z's father ever did. I think their whole theory in life is that I should go out and find me some rich asshole to take care of me and Z. I am not that type of person. I don't want to be with someone because they have money or because they take care of me. I can provide for myself. I don't need a man for that. This whole soap Opera drama is making me sick. I can't wait to see what garbage they will send to me after my grandmother gets that email (I'm sure she will forward it to my mom). I am betting that I get some nasty email in return..

Well I have to start doing laundry and then clean up around the house..

Have a great day everyone!