In My Place

2003-06-13

Still in Mourning

I don't really have much to say today. I am still upset about the news I heard yesterday. Check out the last entry if you would like to know.

I got my review back from diary reviews. I got an Average score. No big deal. I thought I deserved a better score so I signed up for another review from 2 different review sites to get a little more input. I want to make sure my diary is user friendly, easy on the eyes and at least a source of laughter and excitement once in a while. What more can you ask for?

Alex has been harping on me about my smoking habit. I know it's a disgusting habit and I do want to quit. Here's the funny thing though. HE SMOKES. So why in the world is he harping on me as he lights up another one? I don't think he has any right to tell me to stop, when he sure as hell hasn't!! He tells me he is concerned with my health, but I want him to show some concern for his own health!

I don't know what I would do without Alex. We aren't married legally, yet he think we act like we are. We live together, sleep together and raise a child together (although it's not his child). If something ever happened to him it would be like losing a part of myself. He is my better half. He is the one who takes care of me when I am sick. The one who makes me laugh when I am depressed. The one who does all those little things that really do matter, yet he can piss me off at the touch of a button. We rarely fight, which is a plus in my book, and when we do we never stay mad at eachother. We haven't been apart for more that a few days in the last two and a half years. My God..we are like an old married couple. Well at least the sex is still good and plentiful!!

I have been thinking about all of this ever since I heard about Chidi yesterday. He was young and had so much to look forward to and his little girl left without a Dad. I get tears in my eyes because then I start thinking of it happening to Alex.

I need to go now and put the little one in bed and read the usual Little Golden Book!!

Have a wonderful tonight and a beautiful Saturday!

~Rachel

In rememberance of Chidi.. may you rest in peace.