In My Place
2003-01-05
weird erotic dreams and a funeral tape
I had just written a wonderful most interesting entry here and it just disappeared for the 2nd time..i will give up if it doesnt show up this time I sware!! anyway..I had the interesting and weird and vivid dream last night..it was weird in the fact of who was in the dream but I can remember like everything from the dream down to little details and it just felt so real like when I woke up I had to think for a second and then realize it was all a dream...well here goes..It started out kinda normal, I was with my bf Alex it what seemed to be our house but was actually where my grandmother lives though she wasn't there..then I was out walking around in what looked to be the state capital building in charleston which makes sense because of the person I met up with there..well he works there in real life..I started talking to this guy Denny, who is a friend of my ex-bf scott, and we were walking around the capital then it was like we were outside his apartment (though not his apartment in real life, this one was REALLY nice!) and we talked a while did the little flirty things and wound up having sex anyway it was like groundbreaking glass shattering sex the kind you wanna tell your momma about but you can't remember who exactly your momma is...I mean I'm talking 4 orgasm good! anyway...afterwards I got dressed and went back home where Alex was and just went on with my day like it didn't even happen..and this happened the next day in my dream too...but all the while I kept waking up halfway, but not fully able to wake up..I was trying to so I could go back to have a normal dream..anyway the next time I fell asleep..I was just in his apartment like I lived there and we were having sex and like all this stuff was going on around us but we just didn't notice.. so more sex and then I got up and walked around his apartment and this is where i noticed detailed things like cream colored walls and cream carpet and nice bookshelves filled with tons of books and nice modern looking comfy furniture and a beautiful dinning room table and one of those open kitchen with tons of lighting and beautiful glass cabinets...then I woke up..now why in the world my brain decided to remember all those detailed things I don't understand...but what baffles me is the fact that I dreamt of cheating on Alex and that it was with a person who I haven't seen or spoke to in almost 2 years..did I have like some subconscious crush on him or what and why did it choose to come out now and why? This just tells me that I need to get a dream dictionary to answer these questions and the many other that I have had about my weird ass dreams..but I guess thats enough about that...I also listened to a tape of my grandfathers funeral tape..I have had the tape a few months and just now had the courage to listen to it..it was sad made me cry and think of him and how much I miss him...I don't think I will ever get over losing him....Alex has been good to me today...really good..even after I told him about my dream cheating!! By the way he thought it was hilarious especially it being denny that was in the dream...but Alex spoils me so much sometimes...today he did the dishes..i almost fainted..then he did the laundry...then went to my grandmothers with me and helped her do a few things...he's just changed so much in the past few months..for the better of course!! I guess I am just waiting for him to revert back to his old ways of never wanting to hold hands or cuddle..now he won't even let me leave his sight...he is just so good to me that I don't think that I could ever live without him..I know I couldn't live without him!! well I think thats enough for now!~Rachel
|
