In My Place

2003-01-17

genealogy problem and therapy

It is so cold outside. I just went and cleaned off all the snow from my car just so I could go to the gas station and buy a capuccino and some cigs. I guess that shows my lack of will power in going without cigarettes. I have tried to quit. Last time I quit I did so good for almost a whole year, then I started drinking and well you know what goes well with an alcoholic beverage. So then I started up again. I am doing good though. I usually only have about 4-5 cigarettes a day.

I have been trying to get back into my genealogy research but I just can't seem to. I am stuck and it's dissapointing to say the least. Noone seems to remember my great-grandmothers parents names. Therefore I am left with nothing to be able to look up.

Alex made an appointment today to go talk to a therapist. I hope that he will not ask me to go. I just don't think I will be able to talk to anyone about my life and the problems I think I have. He says it will be good for me and I'm sure it would be. I just don't even know where I would start. He says maybe I should go in and discuss problems that I have with our relationship. I do not want to hurt his feelings though. Who wants to be discussing something when the person is sitting right next to you? I will think about going but as of now I say no.

I'm off to read a book and put the little monster to bed.

~Rachel